Stevieslaw: Trickle and Flutter
House Republicans responded today to news that the poverty level would hit a high not seen since 1965 by demanding additional tax cuts for the very rich.
“Tough times demand tough responses,” bellowed Sax Rumor their newly appointed, garishly mustachioed spokesperson. “And so we’ve come up with the flutter law.”
“The reasoning is so simple that even a poor person can follow it,” Sax said. “Billionaires and millionaires can barely close their billfolds now.” “With additional tax cuts, they will be stuck with no place to put their small bills.” “To this end, an important feature of the new law will require that anyone who benefits from it will no longer be able to retain their small denomination bills.” “They will be required to release them so they can flutter down,” he said. “That way, the little people can find them,” Mr. Rumor continued with a tear.
The new law is already generating a media firestorm. Fox News is scheduled to do a two hour special on it tonight. They have already gone on record by stating—“trickle and flutter will end poverty in America as we know it.” A new election advertisement, already airing in the swing states, has a smiling Mitt Romney scattering small bills (mostly ones) to a group of apparently hungry children. Sarah Palin tweeted her support of the new law, although she did spell both flutter and trickle incorrectly.
Stevieslaw advises people planning to vote Republican this November to remember flutter and trickle, the Republican cure for poverty, on their way to the polls. Curious about the Republican plan for the Middle Class? It’s simple—rain—as in, “A Hard Rain’s Gonna Fall.”