A Modest Proposal

Two or three of my passwords changed themselves last night as I slept. Apparently, they’re  programmed to do that every December 5^th on non-leap years as a security measure. So-called experts may disagree with that conclusion, but what else might have happened?

It’s not really much of a problem. I simply need to request a new password on those sites using the old password that I do not know.  I remember using their recommendation for a strong password which looked very much like a word I said around the dinner table when I was five or six, which led to a painful spanking. Fortunately, I have everything written down on a napkin in magic marker. Unfortunately, I washed the paper napkin by accident last week.  It’s only my email and all my other accounts butI lived for many many years without them, so I will be fine.

My local pharmacy has a remarkable device for old people.  It’s a non-screw lid prescription bottle that allows people of my generation access to their many medicines without the need to stand on a street corner with a sign around their necks begging for help in twisting off caps.  Am I bitter? Perhaps.

My modest proposal is that people over the age of sixty five be assigned one single userid/password for everything.  I suggest the userid be your first name and the password be your last name, but perhaps first initial and last initial might be enough. We need to face the fact that anyone who really wants to break into your account, can.  They break into banks and department store and defense department accounts—if they want to see your latest order from the Montgomery Ward catalogue, they will.

Until my modest proposal gets traction, you may get in touch with me by phone or snail mail.  Or stop by.  I have a tablet and a computer for sale.  Perhaps you can figure out how to turn them on.