Obama’s Bold Move

The pundits, who are mostly concerned with whether or not Sarah Palin will enter the Republican race, are about to be blindsided. Smokey Diamond, our intrepid reporter, has once again ferreted out the big story, well ahead of even those reporters who are paid for their work.
Are you sitting down? Barack Obama will announce this weekend that he is in the race for the Republican Presidential nomination. He will note that the reason he moved his jobs speech was so he could participate in the Republican Candidate’s debate. Smokey has run down the fact that the President is prepared to cross file for the election, running as both a Republican and a Democrat—in this way ending partisan politics, “once and for all.”
Obama spokespeople were quick to point out that his decision to run as a Republican was not made lightly. “For a long time now it has been clear that Barack can make himself sufficiently comfortable with GOP positions to allow him to support them or at least not oppose them,” said an unnamed source. “The decision to rein in the jobs destroying EPA was a watershed, focusing the President on what he has become.” “On the other hand, the spinelessness— essential to the Democratic position remains—so that Barack was logically forced to consider cross filing.”
In a related story, Smokey reports that Fox News will close next week for two days for a “what the hell do we do now conference.” Creating a new list of the things we hate more than life itself is expected to be the focus of the two day meeting.

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