With the campaign season about to begin in earnest, many Americans long for a counterbalance to the lying and mudslinging. And today, we at Stevieslaw are pleased to announce the new watchdog/action group Mothers for Manners. The group will assign a mother to each campaign, a dozen to each of the Network News stations, two dozen to each of the Cable News Stations and roughly 1000 to Fox News. The moms will ensure that civilized discourse in maintained throughout the campaign season.
“We will do what mothers have traditionally done through the ages,” said mommy Sue. “If you disparage someone, you will apologize. If you lie you will correct the lie and sit on a stool in a corner so you may reflect on your mistake.” “Potty-mouth will be corrected with soap and water.”
“On some commercial spots,” she continued, “You might hear us in the background recommending, for example—now you apologize to the Mrs. Clinton, Teddy.”
Mothers for Manners says that they will try not to cross the line to corporal punishment, although for some blatant and unapologetic candidates, spanking may be the remedy of last resort.