Stevieslaw: Pentagon to Cut Costs Again

Although Defense Secretary, Ash Carter, was forced to admit that the Iraqi army had “no will to fight” and fled Ramadi even though they grossly outnumbered their enemy, he noted that a careful assessment of the last few battles had led to an amazing cost cutting decision. “We will save the hard-working American taxpayer tons of money,” he said with a smile. “Every time there is a fight and our allies run away, they leave some very expensive and deadly equipment behind for the enemy to use. In Ramadi, they even left behind some tanks.” “We had to go back in and blow all the equipment up.” “This seems wasteful,” he continued, “and we considered several options–the simplest being that we would deliver the armaments directly to ISIS and skip the middleman.” “Congress,it seems, was opposed to this.” “Another plan had us building the equipment, driving it out to a desert site and blowing it up at our leisure.” “Wasteful again, we were told.” “Finally, we decided to pay the armaments manufacturers to not build the equipment–think of paying farmers to not grow alfalfa.” “The armaments people love it, as they can reduce staff substantially and make higher profits.” “Congress loves it as well, as rich manufacturers will be getting richer.” “And the American people should love it also,” he concluded. “Even with paying the transport companies not to ship it, we will end up saving loads of money by not having to deliver, lose and bomb it.” “In addition the Iraqi army will be able to run like hell at the first sign of trouble, without the embarassment of leaving all these American weapons behind” “It’s truly a win-win and American ingenuity at its best.

Advertisements
This entry was posted in gang gang dance, Humor, parody, sleepless in state college and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s