I sat down this morning to write a protest letter to Rep. Glenn Thompson about drilling for gas in the Delaware River Basin. Instead, I started to laugh. Is it possible to find a better way to waste your time than writing to Glenn about the environment?
So Smokey and I spent the morning talking about our finances. I don’t know about you but our finances suffered from the little practical joke Wall Street and the Bankers recently put over on us. We haven’t recovered quite as quickly as CitiBank. So, here is a little investment advice for your disposable income to use during the coming Republican Century. No specific companies are mentioned.
Armament and “Defense” Stock—These are always good, independent of the make-up of the government. We have a Democrat and a Nobel Peace Prize winner running two and a half wars. Smokey and I believe that expendables are the future—Cruise missiles are not reusable. Neither are the bombs the two sides in Libya are using to move desert sand around.
Energy—Under the Republicans, any stock with gas, oil, or electricity in its title is a sure thing. It is also relatively easy to find combined armament and energy companies—hint, think of a major “electric” company that paid no tax this past year.
Services: There are a few good bets here. Private prison providers come to mind. Low end fast food restaurants, which can cater to the increasing number of working poor, are good as well.
Medical: Think of the dismantling of ObamaCare and you think immediately of the insane profits that the medical insurance companies will be reaping. With the end of environmental protection, we are really bullish on an increase in the number of cancer diagnoses. It’s got to skyrocket. Pharmaceuticals are a good bet.
Communication: You can’t go wrong with the soon-to-be- State related TV network that rhymes with nox.
Environment: What is this doing here you wonder? Think of drilling in a river basin that supplies a major city and you come up with? No, of course it’s a disaster in the making, but how do you profit? We suggest you invest heavily in companies that bottle water. It’s a no-brainer. We also like the manufacturer of oxygen vending machines for city streets. Have beachfront? We, in State College, a few hundred miles from the current coastline, are seriously toying with building a beach club resort— a truly Republican answer to global warming.
Feel free to make use of these ideas. Smokey and I can’t as we have just realized that we have no disposable income to invest. Oh well… Dear Congressman Thompson: I protest…