Stevieslaw: Republican Candidates Shocked by Study

We have just learned that a blue ribbon panel, appointed by the RNC to advise their Presidential candidates on science, has concluded that all immigrants, even those here illegally, are of the same species as the rest of us—that is Human. “It is reasonable to assume, for example, said Asit Is, chair of the committee that they, just like us, aspire to make things better for themselves and their families.”
Said RNC Publicist, Wy Me, “If only we had known. I suppose it makes some of the things we have been saying seem a bit heartless.”
Ted Cruz was hopping mad about the report. “I’m sorry we started the whole business,” he said. “What’s next, he continued, a ruling on the equality of women?”

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