Stevieslaw: Silencing Obama
Jubilant Senate Republicans told our own Smokey Diamond today that they were able to suspend President Obama’s phone and internet service. Said, Mitch McConnell spokesperson, Ida Myway, “the senators are tired of hearing from him—Supreme Court, Guantanamo, enough already.”
Ms. Myway said that the process of disconnecting both the Obama’s and the White House Office of Communication’s service was not particularly difficult. “Mitch’s cousin Will works for Verizon,” she said. “He flagged their account.”
“To reconnect their service Obama will have to deal with Verizon’s Dispute Center in Borneo,” Ida continued. “That office has only one phone and no English speaking representations. Wait time just to speak to someone is on the order of 300 days.” she said with a smile.
“And, get this,” she concluded, “There has never, in the history of Verizon, been a successful dispute.” “They are very, very proud of that.”
Who wouldn’t be.